Greetings fellow earthlings,
BRASIL! Brazil: One of the four growing tigers (China, India, and Russia). The world’s fifth most populous country. The world’s greatest soccer players and the most beautiful women. Home of Havaianas, Copacabana and Ronaldinyo. But, you can read all that in a book—what’s it really like? Is it dangerous like in the film City of God, or is it and up-and-coming country set to host the Olympics and the World Cup? This is the final rendition of Jordan Went to Sea Sea Sea, so, let’s find out.
The day was Wednesday April 21st 2010. It was a sunny day in Salvador, Brazil. Well, that didn’t last very long but we’ll get there. Let’s start at the top. I was kind of nervous getting off the ship—I have been safe this whole trip; on the one hand law of averages says something is bound to happen, on the other so does the trend that all other laws are not enforced. I strapped on my money belt, joined up with Tahlor, Pierce and Griffin and headed into town.
Salvador is situated on a hill with the historic district, referred to as Cidade Alta, on top and the bay area, Cidade Baixa, down by the water. Our boat was in the lower area and to get up to the old city, a world heritage site, we had to find the elevator. No one told us that even in the day 2 blocks away from the elevator was a pretty unsafe area. So, we walked into this unsafe area, saw run down houses, scores of homeless people, and general disarray. Luckily, we got out unscathed, and eventually found the Lacerda Elevator. The elevator cost 15 cents, and with no bills lower than a 20 getting up proved to be more difficult than expected.
TO get smaller bills we walked over to the adjacent Mercado Modelo; a cute little market that had many crafts and souvenirs. Someone bought a little gismo or gadget as we all used the change to pay the fee and enter the elevator. After being elevated we took a left and walked into the heart of town. There are two large square connected by the Salvador Cathedral which are filled with street peddlers and vendors. We walked around a bit with our first stop being the San Francisco Church. A beautiful piece of baroque architecture, it started a trend of flat front buildings, where the exaggerated art and architecture was truly on the inside.
We continued down one of the streets, went into a craft shop or two, and noticed that it was about to rain. Hoping to make the best of our time we figured we’d eat while it rained and then continue on with our day. So we ate, and, lo and behold, it stopped raining. We continued walking but saw that it was about to rain again so we walked into a market and, lo and behold, after 15m inutes it stopped raining. So we continued on to the famous area of Salvador with all the colorful houses (ala Cape Town), and what we saw next changed my life. Well, I may be exaggerating but it was awesome.
Remember the strange dude I told you about who sat next to us at the restaurant? You know, the one with the crazy braided Brazil hair, the flamboyant Brazil outfit, and the girl friend who was barely wearing any clothing? WHAT?! I forgot to tell you. O well, now there’s not much to tell I guess. So, turns out he’s not some crazy, but actually a famous Brazilian dancer. AND he is Salvador filming Brazil’s commercial for the world cup. As we arrived they started filming again (after their brief lunch break) and it was awesome. Hot Brazilian women dancers, men doing awesome stunts, really cool, can’t wait to see it on TV. But wait! There’s more! At one point they brought out all the flags of the teams who have made it to the world cup; seeing that we were there, they asked us to hold the flag, and a group of us got to dance with them while waving the American flag. Hopefully that part makes the commercial and I’ll be world famous. Catch me on the TV any given Sunday, win a Super Bowl and ride off in my Hyundai.
With not much to see in the surprisingly small Upper part of town we headed to the elevator and were planning on taking a cab to the Bay Area. However, once we got out of the elevator it started pouring again. SO, this time not caring about our time, just not wanting to get wet, we chilled in a little ATM machine, 3 of us, and waited 15 minutes for the heavy rain to subside. Then, we took that cab.
Once we got to the new part of town we went into the lighthouse, walked around that museum for a bit and continued on to wander town. But then we saw it. Glimmering in the sun light that suddenly began to peak through those dreary clouds. SUBWAY. How could we not. I don’t want to remember how awful the Tuna was, so I will not mention that. Instead I will note that I had subway in Hawaii, China (3 or 4 times), India, and Brazil. China was the best one, but America still wins. So we ate quickly and continued our aimless walk.
Unfortunately, two blocks in it started to pour again. At this point you may be wondering, did you guys contemplate buying a poncho, umbrella, or any form of protection? The answer is no. The reasoning is simple. Well, I assume it’s simple, but I have no clue what we were thinking so I couldn’t tell you. Anyways, after about 10 minutes we left our overhang and walked to a little statue of Jesus on a hill. I’m just saying, Jesus gets some awesome views in this country. I guess it’s not a rough life being 2 billion peoples Messiah.
At this point we were gross, so we went back to the ship, showered, got dressed, and headed out to a steak dinner. Keeping kosher comes in handy when all your friends get a $140 bill. Score one for the good guys. Overall it was an amazing day, though Salvador was an unremarkable city. It felt dangerous (I heard at least 40 stories of people being robbed), dirty and not very large. But, we saw all the hot spots, got s’more gifts, ate Subway, and had a heck of a day. The last port was off to a great start.
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